The Beautiful Lie
He was about four, I think... it was so long ago.
In a garden; he'd done some damage
behind a bright screen of sweet-peas
- snapped a stalk, a stake, I don't recall,
but the grandmother came and saw, and asked him:
"Did you do that?"
Now, if she'd said why did you do that,
he'd never have denied it. She showed him
he had a choice. I could see, in his face,
the new sense, the possible. That word and deed
need not match, that you could say the world
different, to suit you.
When he said "No", I swear it was as moving
as the first time a baby's fist clenches
on a finger, as momentous as the first
taste of fruit. I could feel his eyes looking
through a new window, at a world whose form
and colour weren't fixed
but fluid, that poured like a snake, trembled
around the edges like northern lights, shape-shifted
at the spell of a voice. I could sense him filling
like a glass, hear the unreal sea in his ears.
This is how to make songs, create men, paint pictures,
tell a story.
I think I made up the screen of sweet peas.
Maybe they were beans; maybe there was no screen,
it just felt as if there should be, somehow.
And he was my - no, I don't need to tell that.
I know I made up the screen. And I recall very well
what he had done.
Commentary
I stumbled across this poem by Sheenagh Pugh by sheer accident, in the TLS. It describes the possibilities opened by the making of fiction, of creating counter universes with imagination. I love that heady, delirious moment of discovering - “this is how…” - it’s resonant, memorable. It’s such a powerful affirmation of the magic of ‘making it up’, escaping a too-literal world. “Reality is a nice place to visit, but you wouldn’t want to live there”, as John Barth puts it. Despite the teasing suggestion of Sin (the snake, the garden, the “taste of fruit”), it places creativity firmly on the side of experience. It looks at imagination not as some kind of pure innocent vision, but as something that is born out of some kind of friction, contact with the outside world.
I don’t know much about Sheenagh Pugh, except she’s Welsh and writes wonderfully. She has a website: http://www.geocities.com/sheenaghpugh.
— Amulya