If I had my way with violent men
 I'd simmer them in oil,
 I'd fill a pot with bitumen
 And bring them to the boil.
 I execrate the terrorist
 And those who harbour him,
 And if I weren't a moralist
 I'd tear them limb from limb.

 Fanatics are an evil breed
 Whom decent men should shun;
 I'd like to flog them till they bleed,
 Yes, every mother's son,
 I'd like to tie them to a board
 And let them taste the cat,
 While giving praise, oh thank the Lord,
 That I am not like that.

 For we should love the human kind,
 As Jesus taught us to,
 And those who don't should be struck blind
 And beaten black and blue;
 I'd like to roast them in a grill
 And listen to them shriek,
 Then break them on the wheel until
 They turned the other cheek.